An Interview With Me, Conducted By Him

The idea for this piece came from an interview on Miranda Hart, conducted by herself and published by the Daily Mail. I loved the interview because you got a real sense of the person behind the personality. Also despite her best efforts Miranda couldn’t hide her frustration at having to answer those most frequently asked questions, even though she was asking them.

So the role of interviewer will be played by Matt Emo and the role of interviewee will be played by ME 2. Note: do you like what I did there? I will play the role of both parties and the abbreviation also forms my initials – smooth!

ME 2: I don’t like the idea of this; Miranda Hart is fast on her way to becoming a national treasure and Hollywood star. You’re just some tool who thinks he’s funny.

Matt Emo:  Bit harsh, let’s begin…

ME 2: Okay, so I’ve compiled a list of the questions which you are asked most and hopefully the ones that annoy you the most too.

ME2: Did you know you have the word Quickie on your wheelchair, I mean it literally printed everywhere?

Matt Emo: No, in fact sometimes I don’t know I’m in a wheelchair at all. At times I just feel like a defunct Jetson, just hovering along.

You see the Jestons was a cartoon…  Don’t explain the joke, you tool, it’s not funny if you have to explain the joke.  

ME2: THAT’S GREAT though, just the start I was looking for! So have you ever, you know, jumped down a rabbit hole in your quickie?

Matt Emo: I’m not sure what you mean? I’ve fallen down a number of holes in my chair. Well what I mean is….  Let’s move on!

Me2: So, err why are you disabled?

Matt Emo:  err I’m not sure I didn’t really ask. It’s not like I said, hey big man, make me disabled and while you’re at it, make me partially sighted and throw in some ginger hair – Cracking!

No seriously, I like it when people ask that question because their showing an interest beyond my disability by trying to understand it which is exactly what I’m trying to achieve with my business. To answer the question though Cerebral Palsy, is generally caused by a lack of oxygen to the brain, subsequently causing messages sent to the brain from muscles around the body to be blocked.

Me2: Well I always knew there was something wrong with you Brain. So what’s the most frustrating part of being disabled?

Matt Emo: Your trouble is, you think that you’re funny!  That’s a good question though.

I think there are two things that really frustrate me, perceptions and relationships, allow me to elaborate? Hey whatever mate, it’s your show, I’m just a figment of your imagination and I think the readers would agree with me when I say, you need to get out more.

You see perceptions and relationships go hand in hand.  I don’t see my wheelchair as a problem. It simply allows me to do everything you can do. Well not you obviously but other people. You see, I have a persona that I want people to see every day. However, when you’re in a relationship you can’t hide behind it. A relationship strips you bare, Oooh hello, it throws all of your strengths and weakness together and says, okay here I am, come and have a look. Relationships are scary anyway but practically when you have a disability.

Wow, well that got serious! Honestly you may have got people laughing near the top of the page but now you’ve killed it. I see your point though, plus women have an advantage in the dating game because men have balls. It’s much harder for a man to get that natural intrigue from a woman.

 Well that was an informative statement, any more questions or can we end this torture?

Just a few more

Me2: Why did you set up Devilishly Disabled?

Matt Emo: I wanted to break down barriers and change the perception of disability. I think society has a skewed government led view of what disability is and how it affects people. The truth is everyone’s different and to see that, first you must see the personality of the individual. We, particularly those in the UK, love our boxes because they make life easier. Oh, he’s disabled, he’s gay, he’s black, he’s Christian. No no, he’s just him and I’m just me. My disability doesn’t define me, it’s simply part of me. Get to know the individual and you might just find their awesome.

Me2: Why in the way you have though? Why so risky, edgy and in your face?

Matt Emo: because I want people to be able to by unique gifts for their disabled brother, disabled father, mother or accident prone friend which actually get people thinking. As soon as you get people thinking and engaging, you can change perceptions. Also because a business is always a reflection of the individual who created it, much like a dog reflects it owner. If I was cute and cuddly, we may have used different designs. However, we would then be creating a very standardised perception of disability.

Me2:  And finally, the questions I know will end this interview – how’s the business going and where do you see yourself in five years?

Matt Emo: well, it’s been a tough 12 months both in regard to the business and personally.  The events of the past year have meant that the business hasn’t always been my top priority. However, we’re getting close to some defining deals, in both this business and our future endeavours. Meaning for the first time in a while, I am excited.

The second part of your question is borderline idiotic though. It’s a question which holds no regard for the complexities of life or the speed bumps which may appear.

Boom interview over, If you like Miranda Hart here is the aforementioned Interview 

Thanks for reading





Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *